Moving along...

So I left off by saying we were both in individual counseling; we are both continuing that & he is making more effort to be emotionally available to not only me, but his kids too.  He says counseling is helping him because he is dealing with the past & letting go of a lot of anger & hurt which is in turn helping every area of his life.

I am not totally convinced that things will change for the better forever so although I am making efforts too, I am doing it with a very guarded heart.  Next week is the true test because he's been off of work for a little while & goes back next week.  The girls he likes to cheat with have always worked with him including this last one, who still works with him.  Maybe that's why I won't be convinced until he starts working with her again & then we'll see if things are still changing for the better or if he reverts back to his old ways.

I have reached a point where I am at peace.  Whether he changes for good or if things end I am at peace with it.  I am glad to have a place to vent anonymously & of course would love for our marriage to make it; I took vows that I meant, never wanted to become a statistic & never would want my kids to have to deal with divorce, but the fighting because of his infidelity isn't fair either.  So basically it's make it or break it time next week....we'll see if his wife & kids really mean that much to him or if his selfish ways take over & destroy it all.

I know no matter what the outcome I will be a stronger better person for it.  I know that I am a great mom & nothing will ever change that.  I'll post more when I can, but it may not be until he goes back to work, only because things have been going pretty smoothly with counseling & no temptation.